So recently I've been wanting to do better for myself. I've been going to the gym, tracking my food intake, etc etc. I wanna say it's for my overall health, what with heart problems and the beetus running in my family's blood, but in the end that would be a lie. I wanna look good. I wanna wear some of the capris and shirts that I love that don't seem to fit as well as they could. I'm look at you, Nigel Magikarp shirt. I'd also like to be comfortable cosplaying as various anime characters when convention comes around. But seriously, in the end it has nothing to do with health because, frankly, while I understand my risks I just really love chocolate, ice cream, potatoes, and various other fatty things.
I suppose it's even about my self control, because I know I lack self control. "Oh, have a serving of potatoes? -empties entire package into bowl- -swallows like vacuum-". It's a flaw I recognize along with many other flaws. I'm lazy, unmotivated, procrastination prone, and have the self control of a 3 year old on Halloween. Yes, I'm going to eat so much candy it's all going to end up back on the floor. It's just sooooo good.
To be fair, there are many positive things about me. I mean, I'm capable at extreme neutrality even when my friends are concerned. I'm great at comforting folks and making them laugh until their lungs give out, even if some of my friends can't help but shake their head at my antics. On the flips side, I can be serious when the time calls for it.
Something I also need to do is actually make use of this silly ol' associates degree that has been sitting in my closet gathering dust. Sure, I do the once in a while edits with a group I've been working for since college as far as freelance goes, but that's not enough. I need to go out there and work for an actual company. I need more experience to get better at my work. Don't even get me started on my inability to use Dreamweaver again. Thanks to youtube I'm able to make a new site, though, which I intend to finish within the week. Basically, I'm losing the skills I studied for almost 2 years on.
My dream is to be a full-time freelance designer working from home. Or at least have a really good job in my field, even though I hate the idea of working typical office hours.